Another 2-In-1 BlogIt’s not like this is anything new, but here we go…
I think I’m going to start saying this (the 1st blog title) to myself in the mirror about 10 times every morning when I wake up lol.
As we can see, “Jennifer” wasn’t too happy. Not sure why she felt the need to tell me I was blocked. I was clearly done talking to her lol. But… you know, bitches always gotta have the last word (Stay tuned for my next blog: Why you can’t call a Bitch a Bitch). I blocked out the rest of this screen shot because it divulged information about this lovely young lady that didn’t need to be. All you need to know is that Jennifer from San Antonio does NOT like me now. And why? Why and or how did I get her phone number? Why was she driving all the way here to see me… twice? Once on the way from S.A. to Dallas, and once on the way back? What did I do to piss her off so bad that she had to block me? Because lord knows I’m so hard up for women that I was going to continue texting her every day until she decided to make that drive again lol!
Well, I’ll tell you what it is, as soon as I figure it out.
You know, we all have people on this earth who think the best of us, and those who think the worst; and all points in-between. So it’s only right that someone like me would have both as well, except, I think my scale seems to teeter far to the side of thinking the worst. I honestly think the people who DO like me really don’t like me most of the time. And the only reason they bother sticking around for me is because I mean well and I just don’t care to coddle or tiptoe around anyone’s feelings. About anything. You’re tired of guys treating you like a slut? Stop being one. Want to travel the world, start by getting a passport. No… you’re not fat because you have a thyroid problem. Yes, you’re an idiot for staying with her after she cheated on you. Feeling suicidal? Here’s a knife and some pills… have at it.
I have five children, and I already have to try and coddle them when I’m dealing with them, I’m NOT going to do it for adults. Especially ones my age or older. So when I meet women and they say shit to me like “I’m independent” and I have to point out to them that they live with their parents, are receiving child support, LONE STAR and unemployment… I’m the bad guy, and I guess that’s just how it has to be.
Obviously, being honest really isn’t what people want these days. And it DEFNITELY isn’t expected in the dating world. I suppose since women think all men want is sex; before that initial trip to Pound Town, the woman thinks her ass is supposed to be kissed. Everything she says is right, and she is not supposed to be challenged in the slightest bit. OR else… No cookie! Well, boohoo. I’ve had more sex than any one person should have. Honestly, I do NOT care about it. I care more about whether you want to get to know me, or if you want someone who is going to bend over backwards to make you feel good about yourself even though what you really may need is a swift reality-check.
I met a woman last week who asked me if I had ever heard about “Judson High School”. I told her I hadn’t and she seemed a little put off. I really wasn’t interested but I did manage to get that she had some stock in this school. Maybe her kids wen there. Which they did, but it wasn’t that, that made her swell with pride whenever she mentioned Judson High. It was the fact that she went there and they won many state championships when she went. This woman was FORTY-TWO years old! Forty two! She wasn’t even on the football team (obviously) so why as a 42 year old are so proud of her high school? Like… why are we even talking about that at this point in our lives? Keep in mind this isn’t someone I’ve known for months or years and this just came up. This was the first time we spoke face to face lol. I accomplished a lot in High School… like… a WHOLE lot, but I haven’t brought it up to anyone in many years without being provoked. Like, I didn’t pique in High School lol. And I felt like maybe she did. So I went on to ask about the things shes accomplished SINCE then. Found out a few months ago she had just graduated from nursing school as a BSN. Thats great! I mean… a little late, but better late than never I guess! But I was an asshole for telling her that her bringing up her glory days in high school (in a sport she didn’t even participate in no less) at this age was kinda loser-like. I mean she was seriously feeling some type of way that I’d never heard of that school. Seriously… High school.
That’s just the most recent thing that’s happened with someone I don’t know well. She told me I was being condescending and I was like, eh, whatever… But I just don’t understand this thing about being an “asshole”. Everyone claims that they want honesty… and that it’s so important, but I think it’s a lie. You have many people who just don’t want to hear the truth, especially about themselves. And then you have those who claim its about tact. Which is just another way to say sugarcoating. How many people claim they don’t do that? I ACTUALLY don’t! Why? NO ONE sugar coats anything with me. Life… itself is not sugarcoated.
You think the IRS comes to your house and offers you a backrub and will have an hour-long soothing conversation with you about how they’re about to take all your shit? No… no they don’t do that. Or how about being fired from a job? Depending on the circumstances, you might not even be told. One day your badge may just stop working and a week later you get a letter in the mail! Being up front and honest is just not what people want. People think it’s cute when it’s not happening to them, but not when directed personally.
I can’t think of a single time someone said something TRUE about me in a tactful or non-tactful way and I took it harshly. Got upset. Cut that person off. Etc. If it’s the truth, it’s the truth. From telling me I have a boogar hanging out of my nose, to making jokes about my moobs. Hey.. it’s true. I’m not honest with people to get under their skin… I’m just honest because that’s how you’re supposed to be. And I would much rather those close to me (or anyone for that matter) always tell me how they feel about me, and my actions than holding it in and either talking about me behind my back or waiting til we are in a fight and unleashing it all in a hurtful and/or violent manner.
Funny thing is I didn’t start writing this blog with the intention of talking about my dealings with adults. Although, I know most people don’t like me, it was more geared to the fact that I just found out some of my kids don’t like me. [Fragile! Handle With Care: 2 Part II’s] Or atleast, they can be convinced that they don’t like me. At any given time for the past few months one to three of my children have reported they don’t want to see me. It all started with an argument that my ex wife started between me and two of them which has now escalated into me not hearing from my middle daughter for five months. A little, but rather old birdie told me a few weeks ago what they knew about the situation. Apparently, I’m to hard on them about their hair. She feels like if she’s happy with her hair then I should basically have nothing to say about it. Obviously she or someone has made her confused about what my job as a dad is. It’s not to accept whatever you’re doing… I’m supposed to be teaching you better. And if I feel like you not combing your hair on a regular basis is not a good thing, you should listen! But no… she’s being taught that having nappy hair is natural and she basically doesn’t need to even attempt to do anything to it unless they’re going someplace ‘special’. School is not included in that btw. Also, I play the kids against each other. Because sometimes I will get some kids something, and not the others. There are five of them… this has been happening their entire lives. It’s absolutely impossible to get all of them something at the same time, every single time. Funny… I don’t see her complaining about that cruise they took her on last year, instead of my oldest daughter, whom they were trying to bait go back instead of living with me.
GOD… I’ve gotten off track, forgive me. My inability to compromise the truth, or even just my own values (which is a form of truth) to remain in someones good graces (even my own kids) is the reason why no one likes me. And I get it. I mean, who wants someone around who doesn’t feed you a line of bullshit every now and again just to make you feel good? Or… to tell you that WHATEVER it is you’re doing is just fine, and to not try to improve. Ever. Hell, I guess I wouldn’t like me either lol.
Scream at me
You’re too Honest
I know not much in life is absolute. Water is wet, and people need it to live. Air is invisible, and people need IT to live as well. Other than that and few other general and basic things in life not too much else goes for everyone and every situation. I think something that may go for most people is that people don’t like being lied to. Or at least people would think they don’t want to be lied to.
Another line of thinking I’ve developed recently is maybe people don’t like being lied to about certain things. Like… don’t lie about whether that baby is mine. Or, don’t lie to me about the money that’s missing from my wallet. Etc. But maybe not… lying about whether or not you look good in that dress. Or, lying about whether I was good in bed lastnight. Lying about adequate job performance etc.
These lies are what I think people have always called “being nice”. As I’ve ALWAYS felt (and if you know me you’ve heard me say this before) “nice” is a lie.
Whenever a girl brings her boyfriend round to meet her best friend. Especially that friend that seems to disapprove of ALL the boyfriends; she would say “Now be nice”. Because she already knows she doesn’t like him for whatever reason, but she wants her best friend to ACT like she likes him… for her sake. That’s a lie though. The entire action is a lie.
Or when your friend asks “am I stupid for staying with her?” I mean… first of all, you have to feel something is stupid if you’re asking if it’s stupid in the first place. But when you proceed to tell your friend ‘naw man… just give her some time’ or WHATEVER you tell him..to be nice, to safeguard his feelings, or remain in their good graces, you’re LYING!!!
And I’m pretty certain this is why my circle is so small that calling it a DOT wouldn’t even cover it, but also why when my phone rings it’s usually someone calling for a non-biased or otherwise straight up honest answer about something in particular without worrying about the answer being watered down with horse piss.
Some have said it’s in the delivery. That there’s a more tactful way to delivery honesty. Otherwise known as “sugar-coating”. You know, that thing that almost EVERYONE claims they don’t do? Yea. I don’t do that either.
And I say all this to say… is there a such thing as being “too honest”? I’ve heard the phrase before, and I’ve always taken it as a joke! Like… at what point do people really WANT to be lied to? I mean… there are plenty of things I wish people hadn’t said to me over the years.
- You got man boobs
- You cum too quick
- You eat too much
- You’ve been gaining weight
- You’re probably going to die alone
Etc. It’s not like I LIKE hearing the hard truths, but hey… I would much rather THAT than people tell me bullshit like:
- No, I love your body the way it is!
- I LOVE that you don’t last very long.
- You’re gonna find someone who is right for you one day.
No! I would MUCH rather people be honest with me than lie to me to not hurt my feelings and or blow smoke up my ass! I KNOW when you’re doing it! It doesn’t feel good. It’s… it’s pretty insulting. Because it means that either you’re a coward and just are afraid of the reaction, and/or you think I can’t handle the truth.
Either way, I’ve come to the conclusion that there is a such thing as too honest. Whether you’re tactful or not. People DO want to be lied to about some things, even though they know they’re lies. And when people call you a jerk, an asshole, or distance themselves from you just because you don’t hold back truthful things, this is why.
Before I go, don’t get me wrong, I do know there’s a difference between going out of your way to be mean to people and just being honest. If someone asks me how I feel about homosexuality, or tattoos, or selfie-sticks, or people who eat at In-and-Out burger and I answer… that’s just being honest.
If I go to a church or a mosque, and stand outside with a sign that reads – GOD DOESN’T EXIST – number one, that’s speculative and number two, THAT is being mean, number three you went of your way to do that and it’s unnecessary. That is imposing your opinions and beliefs on others.
Hopefully I’ve cleared something up for you and for myself. And though I understand I don’t really have the ability to lie to people to placate, or to get myself somewhere whether it be into a better professional position or into some guts, I also understand that it’s not really my fault people don’t like it. Me, my empty house and my quiet phone will be just fine.
scream at me