I hate to use the words ‘regular’, or ‘average’ and definitely ‘normal’. We are just the boring in-betweens.
I lay on my couch this morning, awake around 0327, as usual. Not playing GTAV, not reading a book, or sitting on the toilet as usual. I’m just lying here, thinking. And I’m not sure how this came about! Wait… yes I do.
I got a match on Bumble today. A very, very hot Caucasian gal from Austin who was part of an abnormally high large number of fine ‘Bee’s Buzzing in my Hive’ after a trip to Austin this weekend. Part of the reason I’m moving back next year lol. She had a few tattoos, nothing major and she was also “420 friendly”. Before I undoubtedly went to unmatch this pretty tatted girl who smoked weed proudly and obviously kissed dogs on the mouth [just not for me, sorry] I realized that I’m just a boring in-between. I have no major cause, nor am I part of a movement or group of like-minded individuals who use whatever that thing is to band themselves together. Such as
- Tattoo’d/inked people
- Pet/Dog lovers
- Potheads and other recreational drug users
- Trump supporters
- Anti-Trump supporters
- Black Power People
- Hufflepuff, Raven… whatevers [Harry Potter geeks]
- “Body Positive” folks
- Gym Rats / Health nuts
- NRA and Weapons Rights nuts
- Religious nuts
I’m a just a guy. I am a Dad, but I don’t seek attention or adoration for it. I’m a veteran, but aside from wearing my dogtags, I don’t thrive on people knowing that or showing it off, nor do I feel the need to mention it everywhere I go or beg for discounts just because I have a DD214 and an honorable discharge. I try to eat right and I do believe fitness is important, but as you can see… I’m not a gym rat or a health nut. I love to read, but I can’t claim to be a bibliophile, because I write much more than I read. I don’t dislike animals, but I can’t claim to love them, and I despise people who feel the need to take them everywhere. I’m black, but I don’t think we are magical, I don’t think we are better than any other race or color [but I do believe unique in ways… kinda like everyone else gawwww] and I don’t look down my nose at other races. I love technology and I can wire up a speaker system like a champ, but I’m not a techie by any means. I have a couple guns, but I’m not on the damn NSA watchlist because of all the arms I own. Who the fuck really needs that type of arsenal? I mean, honestly… If the government [or zombies] decide to come after us, what makes you think any of the AR’s and pistol’s and shotguns you have are going to stop a fucking MRAP, or a Reaper popping laser-guided missiles into your home and your EMP proof truck and camper full of supplies out back. Give me a break.
Now, some of these things are just simple groups, and some of them are really… I feel people who feel the need to be a part of something that has a support system, all the while claiming they do it because they’re being original, or it’s something they just want to do without the influence of anyone else. Which… is preposterous. No one wakes up thinking they want a tattoo because they’ve never seen one before, but just thought it was a bright idea to engrave something meaningful (or not) on their skin. Homosexuality is not a new thing. Nor are any of the other letters of the alphabet tacked on to the original Lesbian and Gay movement. Now, I believe it’s more of a trend. While people nowadays all claim that they didn’t DECIDE to be gay, but they were born that way, I would love to know why no one said that before some scientist came out saying they found some lobe (or whatever), that no one can actually name or verify that they were born with to make them not be attracted to the opposite sex. Or to be attracted to both sexes. Or to be “polyamorous”. My GOD, I could go on forever. Which to me, this is just a group of people who like doing freaky shit with whoever, where ever and would like a rational excuse for it, and a large group of people behind them saying “Don’t worry booboo, I do it too… it’s okay”. Sidenote… I really hate how they just hijacked the rainbow. Like, fuck ya’ll I like rainbows too.
Bodypos… sometimes I just wish I could just say “Fuck it”, go to 5 Guys everyday, get as big as I want, and post pictures of my flabby ass everywhere and claim I’m happy with who I am or with my size and health because everyone ‘LIKES’ it and says how “brave” and “beautiful” I am. Even though I know I can’t do half the shit I want to do, and washing my ass or tying my shoe is more of a chore than it rightfully should be. But hey! There’s a movement for it! And By golly, if there’s enough people hyping me up about it… or there’s some makeup artist out there who can doll me up for a photo shoot, and find some underwear big enough to still be pretty while I wear it, I’m gonna flaunt it! Because it’s not about standards… its about if someone can make me feel good about it, and SOMEONE out there agrees with me. – And I know… “BODYPOS” is supposed to be a movement encouraging people to be happy with themselves no matter what body type they have, but lets face it… Ariana Grande [or anyone who looks anything like her] doesn’t really need anyone to tell her that her body is ok lol. Except for anorexic people, and I don’t know how many weirdos out there are wanting to boast anorexia or bolemia as a lifestyle. But hey, who knows?
Potheads… probably THE LEAST original thing to be right now and for the past 40 years. Again, not something one just wakes up and thinks of doing without having heard about it, read about it or being influenced to do it. YOU ARE NOT ORIGINAL! As you all say “everyone smokes weed” so why the fuck do people 1: act like they need it 2: act like it helps them 3: act like it’s NEVER hurt anyone somehow 4: think that since it’s legal SOMEWHERE that it’s legal where YOU are! 5: claim they smoke weed because THEY WANT TO, not because it’s just something everyone else does. Keep lying to yourselves, potheads. You’d think with how creative pot is supposed to make us, you’d come up with some better shit. Just admit you’re a follower, you don’t mind stinking the place wherever you go, and you weren’t thoughtful enough to come up with an actual hobby. Barely anyone on earth NEEDS weed. And for those very few who actually do need weed, they don’t call it WEED!
But when it all comes down to it… do I want my son to grow up and bring a dude home? Do I want any of my kids to be obese, and think it’s ok that they sweat all day and all night knowing damn well they’ve only taken about 100 steps that day? But just to make them feel good and safeguard their feelings I’m gonna tell them to be BODYPOS? Do I want any of my kids to adorn themselves with tattoos that do absolutely nothing to help them or anyone else? And reassure them, that even though they’ve ruined their God-given skin, there are some people out there who have tattoos and jobs! LoL. There are people who have tattoos and have found love! LoL. Shit, there are rapists with jobs… the fuck is that supposed to mean? Do I want my kids to grow up being so consumed with muscles, and fitness and dieting that they don’t allow themselves to have fun? That they look down their noses at people who aren’t as physically fit as them? Never being satisfied with the results of their hard work to the point where there kinda really is no where else to strive to get lol? Sometimes I look at these health nuts and I ask myself… “What else can they do?” Black power… White power, woman power… all this bullshit. I just never understood the need for it all. And why people feel that they need to have some movement or band of people to join to be extreme about something. The breastfeeders… plopping their tits out in public everywhere just because they can… asif breastfeeding is something new lol! It’s not bewbew… You feeling the need to be a low-key exhibitionist is new. And just because there are bunch of Bible-toting assholes out there who want to shame people for breastfeeding publicly doesn’t mean that either extreme needs to have their needs met. But here we are… with a group of people who GOTTA form a cause for “rights” to breastfeed ANYWHERE, when most nursing moms really have no problem breastfeeding anywhere modestly. Or atleast having a nice, clean, area set aside for them to do so. But no…
It’s all about the causes, and the movemnts, and the hashtags and groups of people willing to rally behind you no matter how ridiculously you’re carrying on. And no one DARE speak out on it or you’re going to be shunned and marked as a hater, or a hateful person, or in my general case, an Asshole. Well… so be it.
Here’s to all the Boring, In-Betweens. Those of us who just want to live and work, and be ok, and not be harassed and not harass anyone. Those of us who can live a good life without having the backing of a large group of people, without a fucking GoFundMe, or a rallying “cause” or some magazine made just for us. Here’s your hashtag. #BoringInBetweens
Remember, if you can print it on a T-Shirt or make a catchy meme out of it… it must be okay.
Scream at me